What Does December Really Mean?

Sitting here thinking how could it be that we are just about to go into the middle of December the last month of this year.

Thinking of what is to come. I must admit my head is running like crazy trying to put it all together and not fall apart while I do it.

I think how we are all running about trying to make it all seem “perfect” when it’s really not. What has this month really become? To be honest Christmas time really wasn’t ever a big deal for me to say the least. All I remember was how my single working mom tried her best to give my brother and I some gifts under the tree which would be removed probably a day or two after.

Perhaps that is why I get so hard on myself because I want my kids to actually remember Christmas and not because of the gifts but memories to actually have stories to tell that has nothing to do with gifts.

To remember sitting about making those gingerbread houses that will fall apart the moment you finish them but remembering the laugher of the time spent together.

To get in the car in our pajamas and check out all the lights and decorations. To sit in the living room and watch our favorite Christmas movies for the 100th time and laugh as if it’s our first time.

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To see the wonder in the face of my kids. As all these things are happening I wonder is it enough for them to remember?

To hear the joy my youngest singing at mass and ask why is the Priest wearing the pretty purple again?  Especially with our hard Summer I admit I feel a sort of guilt that it should be an extra special December but as it’s looking there will not be any of the material things but I am trying my best to make it a December they do enjoy and remember without the material things.

I get so upset because why is it that we think material things is what this month is about?

To be honest until my children I really did not know about what the Advent season was about.

I didn’t even know that there was a countdown not to just getting material things but what December 25th truly means.

Our Savior is born.

To pause and think about that and to think how Joseph and Mary were basically homeless and the night he was born they had no clue what was going to happen and to have to basically have your child in a dirty little cave but there swaddled was the perfect gift ever.

Tired and not knowing what the next day would hold just believing that is what they had. I sit back and think how ungrateful am that I am more worried about not being able to put things under our tree.

I want to be able to share not only with my children but with anyone who reads this to remember the real reason. I know it can be hard I know it is for me.

Especially when this world is really about all the material things but think of what you can do is not a material gift that will mean more and truly be remembered then that box that is supposed to be unwrapped. I want to give that gift to my children as we read each night about Advent that it sticks in their head perhaps. That they can go about their day but have that gift tucked in their heart.

Remember we already have to the greatest gift we just seem to be forgetting to unwrap it.

So this December I pray our Lord helps me remember the real reason why no matter how much this world tries to distract all of us it seems. What are some things your doing to remember the true meaning of this season?

Oh, Come Oh Come Emmanuel…

Before The Sun Rises Mama Chronicles

 

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Up before the sun because my oldest girlie has one bad cough, & so my nurse hat has been on. Feeling drained as I have been up since 5 am for work during the weekend & not going to bed till past midnight can break a mama down.

Making sure the other kids are feed, getting things ready for the new week. So much busyness.

Photo taken with Focos
The cross is from rough2rustic

All I can say is Lord I am tired. From the corner of my eye I see the cross I gave my 15 yr old son last night when he arrived after staying in my in-laws.

His bag is on the floor his school bag in the other corner & there in the dresser. You Lord. I grabbed it and just kissed it. I escape as so many mamas to the bathroom. Crayon on the floor. I am tired oh look at that I have a cough too, but moms aren’t suppose to get sick right?

As I seat I think of all that I have to do this day with calling to say no school for my girls today I look at our Lord.
So beautiful just his silhouette. I think Lord I am tired, I think of this past Summer. I hear a voice inside saying see you can. I did it all for you so you can. Those are words so hard to swallow but even more to believe. Really Lord all for me?
You did this for me. You died for me? I think of how Advent is just a week away. I have a million things I want to do I have so many plans running in my head.
Once again I hear that voice. Be Calm. Why is that so hard.
Stop, I just want you to be with me. Lord help me to slow down. To focus on you and not all this busyness.
To remember to give up my woes to you. With my lips let me give you praise to show my kids so that they may want to come to your feet and praise too.
I hold this cross and can’t help but kiss it and thank him.
I look out the window the sun is rising. Lord I give you this day.
Help me to not rush the day but to pause in between & squeeze     Praise to you throughout my day be it as I look for the lost socks, rushing a kid out the door, cleaning up messes left behind, work emails, and anything else that may come my way.
Help me remember what this Advent season is really to mean. What are you doing this Advent?  I am joining Blessed is She : Bearing Light prayer devotional       can’t wait to start. I also want to bible journal each day for 25 days and also will be doing the Jesse Tree with my kids from Do Small Things With Love which I really hope they will love as much as I have been doing it.
I would love to hear what you are doing. Let me know.

Parenting Will Give Your Prayer Wings

This is a little something I wrote last night… cause parenting is far from pretty roses and happy days.. They say it’s hard when they are little I think otherwise. I think the older they get the harder it gets..Here is a window to my parenting journey…

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As I sit here past 1 am waiting on my oldest to get home. I think so this is what my
own mother must of felt. Anguish despair and well hopelessness. Waiting till I
came home while I basically had no care in the world just the knowledge that each
moment that I stayed out later then what I was told to would be a long
conversation as to how she was right and how I was not considerate of her feeling.
Here I sit in the couch in the living room while typing with a rosary on my lap
praying the Memorare until he gets home. I will get the face. No thanks mom nor I
love you as those I can’t remember the last time I heard one from him but I make
sure I say it as often as I can because I still till this day don’t recall it being said from
my own mother although I know she does.
Here I sit and pray to keep him safe. This world is so much different then when I
was growing up.  Is this what my own mother thought. Here I sit and think Mama
Mary did Jesus give you this anguish? Sure we heard of him being lost for 3 days
although he answered well Hello where did you think I would be?
Everything I read that I say hmmm Yup that could so would have been me. Because
at 20 I knew best. I was  considered an adult but I really wasn’t one at all.
Just as my son is doing now. I believed in God but only when I really wanted
something or needed something.   I sit here and wonder is this what my mother felt.
With each moment that passes I kept his name on my lips and tell our Lord to keep
him safe. With each moment that passes I try to give him the freedom I know he
deserves after all he is a good kid but still the fear of wanting to keep our kids safe
wants to over take me and so I pray. Lord keep him safe and let him come home
safe.
Parenting will give your prayers wings as you give all you have with each word you
cry out to our Lord and Mama Mary especially her  as she of all would understand what you are feeling.
I understand our children need to grow and that we are suppose to let go. Yet here
I sit and pray that I hear the keys so I know he’s safe and home. So that I may
give thanks to our Beloved Mother for helping me keep him safe.
Is this what my mother felt? Till this day at the age of 42 she actually does still
worry (dare I say even more?!) and will call me more then five times in a day. I know it’s her way of letting me know she cares and is worried but I got it no NOW I really do so hmm seriously let go. Ha..

I always said I wouldn’t do that and be over bearing so that my own kids can know I
trust them and I try my best to let them fly but I can’t help but worry and here I sit
after 1 am waiting.
Giving up my worry to our Lord and even though Padre Pio tells hey Ellie don’t
worry it’s hard. So I give my prayers wings and hope our Blessed Mother hears me
and our Lord Jesus protects him till he arrives home safe.
Then I get to do this tomorrow and not only for him but for his other siblings as
they are too growing and want to fly and explore outside the nest. I now know why
as we get older we get grey hair especially when you’re a parent…this right here…
I just hope one day if anyone of my children become parents they remember me as
I sat waiting on them.

Perhaps they will as me holding a rosary in one hand and typing something too and say now I know why my mother would pray and tell me to pray too because NOW I understand why my mom does too…

Heart Break and Faith

How many times have you said “God Bless you” to someone? Think about it for a second. It’s almost an automatic thing if someone sneezes am I right? Now think about what you are saying God Bless you.

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Now, how about “I’ll pray for you” When you hear someone is going through something. Are you just saying it or will you really pray for that person? These are words that people say without really thinking for the most part. They may have the true intention to do so but do they really?

As of late with all that is going on with my family. We have heard lots of “We will pray for you” I feel sad to say some just think it’s something they should say.

It actually reminded me of how when our Pretty Girl passed  I am pretty sure other parents who have lost a little one dread hearing the “I’m so sorry” I get it I do, we are humans and get uncomfortable when things that aren’t good happen and we have no clue what to do.

Right now with all that is going on with my family, I am so blessed to say that help has come from unexpected places that really have touched my family and me.

There has been lots of growing as well spiritly which I truly believe has been a good thing. Remember that post I talked about not getting cold in your faith well be careful what you say /or ask for because this has been a test of faith for sure. I have cried out truly and given completely.

The place I feel the safest is in the morning as I walk to mass just about every day. It is my refuge. It’s where I have been going and it’s how I have to start my day.  It’s been my strength.

I must say that although we are here and my heart is so thankful I have learned so many lessons but most of all the lesson of surrender to our Lord has been the biggest.

Right now my prayers are for more opportunities for work be it at home or out I need to bring in more of an income.  I am trusting in the Lord to guide me as to where and what my next steps should be.

As we settle in this new place I wake up with a thankful heart. I can not say how much my heart has changed as to how much I want to let our Lord in more than I had before.

This was one of the hardest Summers but it also was one of learning to truly let go and trust. so I admit I am still afraid that I know is just still “leftovers’ of well this traumatic Summer.

I am working on bringing this blog up to speed as I did post that I would have a Wordless Wednesday but all I’ve had is a postless Wednesday (oops) I also want to do start bring you reviews of small companies that I thing deserve to shine because after all small businesses really give the best customer service and attention to detail and I truly appriecate that.

If perhaps you are a small business (Catholic/Christain based) please feel free to contact me!

With that I say thank you for stopping by and I look forward to hearing from you and getting to know you better.

Wordless Wednesday (on a Friday)

If you follow me on Instagram then you might have seen me announce that I was going to start up once again on my blog Wordless Wednesday. You Might be famlair to this or not but all it is, sharing a picture w/out words. Letting the image to tell your story.

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If you want to join in I would love it! It’s super easy and a way to document your days.

 

With that being said here is my picture for the week. When I saw this rug I knew it was what we were going to need at our new home. As this has been the Summer of making Lemons into Lemonade.We are beyond thankful for the blessings and grace our Lord has shown us during this very hard time.

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What will you remember from this week?  Looking foward to next week as I already know what I want to share.

Squeeze Play

If you know my family and myself you know we love baseball so more or less when things happen around here we use “baseball terms” right now we are going to use one today.

Let’s just say we got hit really hard by one 99 per hour fast ball with what we got dealt with at the moment.

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We are in the midst of being doubled down in pain but in the middle of it we have been seeing people come out of the dugout that we never thought would.  Instead of who we might have expected others have offered a helping hand.

Life is sure good at showing and shining the light at truth especially in moments like this.

I also have been able to dig even deeper into holding on to our Lord. Although I felt my faith was better then it was in years right now this moment is putting all of it to the test.

Sure I have cried, but I cry out to our Lord. I make sure to pause and give him praise. Although we are in the middle of not knowing where we will be moving nor having the money for the move.  Having to humble myself to basically “beg” for help  HE is there and he will watch over us I trust and believe.

I truly believe that this is a learning and growing experience for us all. The whole thing we need to remember is that no matter what or where we end up the place will be a home because we are together.

Leaving w/a quote I heard today about Mother Teresa who said God doesn’t give us more then we can handle but I sure we wouldn’t trust me so much.  (cause we have always find a reason to smile!)

 

 

 

 

Just Cause It’s Getting Hot Don’t Get Cold!

Happy July guys… (can we get that pause button please!?!) At my home school is FINALLY done!! As I type I am a proud mama to a Junior in College (can I seriously be that old for one!?!?!) Sophorme in HS (again am I that old to have one of those!?!) a Sweet 6th grader and a Kindergartener  who happened to turned 5 last week! (wait didn’t I JUST have her!?!?!)

 

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I am beyond proud of them and pray our Lord countines to enlighten them and keeps guiding their steps not only education but in faith .. OK enough of the sappy mama stuff you know this also means no more alarms! YAY.  Let’ say that again NO MORE ALARMS.. Sure my youngest will get up by 8 am but I will take it.

Which brings me to discussing why I wanted to post. Now that it’s Summer we might actually go into lazy mode. Which means you might not get up before the kids do to your morning prayer, or might not take that time during the day to pause for a reading, might not make it to church during the weekend because you are tired from the Saturday fun or think oh just an hour more and I’ll get up to only see that you are too late and get a call that there is a barbaque and forget to attend mass.

Summer can be a time where we figure oh it’s time for Fun but we have to remember we can not get luke warm or even cold in our faith just because we are busy with having fun.

Here are a few things I’m doing so I wouldn’t go into Summer Faith Mode.

  • Still set an alarm so you can pray in the quiet first thing in the morning.
  • Read a book that will enrich your faith (don’t  let it be only your kids who are reading)
  • Attend one or two  extra masses during the week. Check for adoration times.
  • Keep a Summer prayer Journal.
  • Start a new devotion. There are so many beautiful ones to take up.

I hope these few ideas will keep your heart on fire. I am trying to keep this list as well. My family is actually going through a very hard period so if you could keep us in your prayers I would be so thankful. That is another reason why I am holding on to this list and keeping my faith more on fire.

You can see HERE what is going. My family would be thankful for any prayers you could spare. We are nervous but we have more faith then Fear.

Not wanting to end this post with a downer I want to share that I will have a giveaway on my next post. As always thanks so much for stopping by. I’d love to hear how your Summer is going so leave me comment below.

 

 

 

THs